Decisions

Go home or slug it out here for 2 more years?

Just lost right now man.

Don't know what to do.

Afraid of regretting decisions.

Part of me says do what everyone does. Study and go get a job. Go for interviews and all of that.

Part of me says take a break from engineering and do different things. Explore. Broaden my views. Fall back on that engineering degree if I find that it's what I really want to do.

I'm pretty sure I don't want to sit in a lab all day.

And unfortunately postgraduate studies requires me to do exactly that.

But also don't want to hear "That dude went to Japan and came back. What a waste."

Are opportunities available back home?

Talked to Guna, a close highschool friend over the weekend.

He says work life is fun but it gets stale after a while. And lonely.

And you start from zero anyways.

Talked to a working senior here.

He says you learn much more from working than you do at postgrad studies.

Home is where the heart is.

I have my family at home. I'm horsecrap without my family.

I have friends everywhere. Every one of them I keep close to my heart.

You earn more here. But hey as I've said. 2 years of slugging it out ain't pretty.

2 years seem short but long, and long but short at the same time.

Right now I'm 70:30. (slug it out:go home)

Where do I go from here!!!???

Our deepest fear

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear
is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness,
that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous,
talented and fabulous?
Actually who are we not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people
won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine as children do.
We were born to make manifest
the glory of God that is within us.
It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.
And when we let our own light shine,
we unconsciously give other people
permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.

- Marianne Williamson

A conversation

Sis: what type of craziness is it that causes a person to think working on a project on a Saturday evening is more "fun" that watching a movie at the cinema? kthxbye

(and by fun I mean "why am I not watching "Hugo" in 3D instead of poking at this code and wondering what the hell is going on with the code right now??)

Bro: lol i think projects are more fun then movies, especially if you understand the project. I have developed the habit of sleeping at cinemas anyway

Me: ....

Mum: not me, I won't be of any help. Macam tikus membaiki kelambu? Haha, better for u to figure it out yourself!

:like sister like brother or birds of the same feather?

Me: Well then that makes me a penguin, I guess.

Sis: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gKWNUyTGqss&t=1m

....

My family.

What would I ever be without them.